The invisible cost of Work ruling your Life

Do you care for yourself?

Work-life balance (vs Workaholism)

Contrary to the popular notion that insisting on work life balance (WLB) hurts your chances of getting a job, in my case it actually helped me get a job!

In 2019, I expressed in no uncertain terms during an interview with a CEO that WLB is important to me – I have active interests that I pursue and I generally like to keep my weekends to myself. The interviewer (later, my boss) recognized from his own experience, the toll that the lack of WLB can take on personal health and on the quality of decision making. 3 months into the job, when I met him for the first time after my interview (he was based out of NYC), he said he hired me because of the conviction I had about my WLB priorities (not despite it, as we normally think).

Is it possible that my experience was an exception and not the norm? Yes, possible. But I hope this helps others understand that there is a segment of employers who recognize the importance of personal time. Then, we just need to find that segment while job hunting.

Do we reflect enough if our actions are in line with our priorities in Life?

I’ve observed that when leaders are asked “what would you tell your younger self”, there is one consistent response / recurring theme – that they regret not having spent more time with their family/self and that they would have preferred to focus on their personal life better.

Why should we realise this only when we get older? Why can’t we do this NOW? Why do we chase career goals at the cost of our personal well-being? The pandemic made this point abundantly clear — that chasing work at the cost of your health, can cost your life. I know batchmates and friends of mine who (are having to) put in long hours at work and I am deeply concerned for them.

Pls pause and ask yourself this:

• When was the last time you took a clean break from work?

If the concept of “Clean break” is new to you, I would describe it as being away from office with no office calls / emails during vacay time unless there is an emergency.

• Are you bringing your work home (or taking your personal work to office)?
• In WFH scenario: Do you have time blocked to sit down and have a peaceful meal without interruptions from work? Do you keep checking your Work Notifications during personal time?
• Do you get 6-8 hours of sleep?
• Are you spending sufficient time on your personal well-being (fitness / interests)?
• Are you happy with the amount of ‘quality time’ you spend with your family?

‘Quality time’ refers to the time spent with someone, giving them your undivided attention (without looking into gadgets, thinking about some unfinished task at work etc)

• Are you capable of talking about anything other than your work when you catch up with someone? (or even at home!)

To sum this up the single litmus test question would be,

Do you have a Life outside of Work?

In case you sense early signs of trouble basis your response to the above questions, pls take steps to fix it on an immediate basis. There is no better time than NOW.

What can you do to achieve your desired level of WLB?

I’ve experienced the high you get when you achieve something at work. It’s great and addictive! But that does not mean it comes at the cost of WLB . It is fine if you love your work and that’s your passion. But don’t compromise on your health.

Balancing your Work & life does not mean lack of ambition. It just means you are willing to put effort into being productive during your work hours.

• Plan your work:

We tend to give this excuse that it is not possible in certain jobs to take clean breaks. I have seen that, it just boils down to planning & organizing your work (and maybe to some extent depends on how your org/team is structured).

• Set boundaries:

If you are constantly thinking about work even after coming home (or during your off-work hours), you won’t be able to mentally switch off from work. Have clear boundaries to ensure all the digital alerts on your phone don’t interrupt your personal time.

• Stop abusing your body:

If you think, you don’t need to sleep for 6-8 hours/day, check with your doc if you are damaging your body or not. Hear out the consequences and remember the risks you are taking.

If you know your friends / family members who are under work-related stress, pls reach out to them and urge them to think.

Let’s reflect and act before it is too late.

Note: I wrote this after my ex-boss (mentioned in the 1st paragraph) passed away when he was <50 years old, due to cardiac arrest.